Patience

I find myself lacking greatly in patience these days.  Things that normally wouldn't bother me at all can send me into a near rage.  When my dog won't stop barking (which then gets the other one barking)...when another car turns in front of me...when I can't get my iTunes to work the way I think it should...it can be anything, really.  I go to bed cranky at night, hoping that I'll wake up in a better mood.  And invariably, I wake up just as cranky as when I went to bed the night before.  Occasionally, there are brief moments upon waking that I forget that I'm cranky...but it sets in before I can even enjoy the break.

I understand why I'm so impatient and cranky.  I understand that I have to give myself time and allow myself to feel everything I'm feeling.  That understanding is in my head...it doesn't make its way to my heart.  My heart doesn't understand why it's in so much pain.  My heart doesn't understand why this has happened (though, to be fair, my head doesn't understand that, either.)  My heart doesn't understand, it just hurts.