Originally posted on CaringBridge on December 4, 2014 6:12pm
This journey they call grief is filled with highs and lows. Some of the lows are pretty obvious...when a loved one passes...the funeral...trying to get back to "normal" life. And there are the highs...especially for our journey...seeing a packed Buffalo Wild Wings with a line out the door - all filled with people wanting to help Henry's family...seeing an article about Henry in the local paper...getting new tattoos to honor Henry. These are things that make us smile, warm our hearts, and ease our pain.
Some of the lows, though, are not so obvious. Such as tonight...I have an overflowing laundry basket but can't seem to find the motivation to take it downstairs to wash it. The counters that are filled with "clutter" and drive me crazy, but not quite crazy enough to do something about it. The growing and growing to-do list, which rarely gets anything crossed off. These are the things that remind me that "normal" life still seems like it's on a distant horizon, or maybe that it's really a mirage. I can't quite picture "normal" life anymore. I can picture going back to work, but am afraid I'll take the route to daycare instead of straight to school. I can picture going to the grocery store, but will plan my route in order to avoid the baby section.
I know that our "normal" will come in time. I know that no one is rushing us to get there. And in the meantime, we will ride this tide of highs and lows...
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