Today while I was in the lunchroom, one of the students asked me, "Are you going to get another baby?" Usually, when the kids ask questions or make comments about Henry, it really doesn't bother me. But this one, for some reason, caught me off guard. I'm not sure why. It might have been the "day after a snow day" crankiness...the crazy morning I had...the fact that it's just plain cold outside...who knows. Regardless of the reason, this particular question on this particular day felt kind of like a punch in the stomach.
Perhaps it was the answer to the question that bothered me. I told the student, "Hopefully one day we'll have another baby." That was an honest answer. But I didn't add, "But I wish we still had Henry and Brady, too." I think that's the part that got me today. Yes, God willing, we will have more children one day (18 according to an off-hand comment Tim made one day...or perhaps a slightly lower number...) But we will never have another Henry or another Brady. We could have 18 children, and still miss Henry and Brady. Our earthly family will never feel quite complete. We will fill it with love, and joy, but our two oldest boys will always be in our hearts, if not in our arms. Henry and Brady will always be part of our family, our stories, our history...but we most definitely miss them in our present.
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