Nostalgia

Tonight we had dinner at one of our favorite restaurants in our area - Buffalo Company.  They make the best buffalo chicken sandwich.  They were closed for renovation though most of my pregnancy, so we were extremely excited when they re-opened shortly after Henry was born.  In fact, it was probably one of the first restaurants we took him to.  Like most places we took him, the employees ooh-ed and aah-ed over Henry.  On that first visit, he was a sweet little angel...he fell asleep shortly after we got our food and napped while we ate (see the video below where he is trying to stay awake!)  On a later visit, he was a bit more...vocal.  On that visit, Tim and I had both eaten our sandwiches but we were still a little hungry, so we ordered some tots.  About as soon as we had ordered them, Henry started fussing.  Then he started wailing.  Everything we tried resulted in him screaming louder and louder.  Finally we asked that our tots be made to go, and we left as soon as they were ready.  Basically, Henry was telling us that it was HIS turn to eat!

We were feeling a little nostalgic walking into the restaurant tonight.  After we ordered, I started looking through my phone to see if I had any pictures from our previous visits.  I didn't find any pictures, but I did find a video of our first visit, when Henry was struggling to keep his eyes open.  This led us to looking through more pictures, and then led to a few tears.  When the employee brought our food, she asked us if we were the people with the "cute little baby."  Then, of course, we have that moment of panic...what do we say?  Tim told her that Henry had passed away, and then she had that moment of panic...what do I say?  She said she was very sorry, and walked away before her tears started falling.

These are the situations that remind us of just how far Henry's memory reaches.  We visited Buffalo Company perhaps a handful of times with Henry, but he left that lasting impression.  I hate that we have to tell people that he died...that we make other people sad...that we are so sad.  I hate all of it.  So instead, I will cling to the fact that this person who saw Henry no more than four or five times remembered him as a cute little baby.