What a difference a year makes...

It's been a year now since Henry gained his wings...a year since I held my baby boy, my husband's arms around me, as he took his last breath...a year since we had to once again leave the hospital without bringing our baby home...a year since our life was forever changed... It's been a year of grieving, crying, learning...we have grieved and cried for our sweet monster, and we have learned what a huge impact his short life had not only on us, but on so many and even on the world.

Our lives are completely different now than a year ago. Our house is a little less hectic, though not necessarily quieter since we have acquired two more dogs (for a total of three). We are a bit more free in our social planning, not having to plan around naps, feedings, or availability of babysitters. Things like quiet time together as a family are even more valuable now than before.

We are still learning how to live without Henry. Each day, we make the decision to get out of bed...go to work...to adult. Some days it's easier, some days it's harder, but we keep on going. Even through our immense grief, we also feel immense love and joy, as we witness the impact Henry had on so many.

I know I myself am a much better person than I was a year ago, thanks to Henry. I am more compassionate, more patient, and much less judgmental. I have faith in the good in the world, as Tim and I continue to be showered with love, prayers and support, even a year later. I am, surprisingly, more optimistic...I know that I have many things and people in my life to be thankful for (especially my husband) and I know that more good things will come our way. Even as we struggle to get pregnant, I know our boys are planning and plotting...making sure they get the perfect sibling(s). 

Most importantly, Henry taught me the true meaning of the word hero. Tim and I always say Henry didn't lose his battle against leukemia. He would have kept fighting, but his little body just couldn't keep up with his fighting spirit. Henry's strength and spirit lives on, and his strength and spirit keeps us going. We love you Henry, today and every day. Thank you for bringing such joy and love to the world.