Don't take time for granted

Today, I finally got the nerve to attempt to make my mom's pasty (pronounced like past-y...it's a short a) recipe for dinner. It's a recipe for a Welsh meat pie, one that her dad made for her, and she made for us. As I grew older, I always wanted to learn how to make them, but I never took the time to do that with my mom. So instead of going through the steps with Mom by my side, I had to attempt to figure out the recipe on my own. And it's one of those recipes that isn't necessarily the most clear...there are some places where you have to infer what comes next. Even when I was younger and Mom made pasties, I never hung out in the kitchen with her...instead I made myself scarce! So today was definitely a blind attempt on my part...

This was just another reminder to never take time for granted. Before Mom got sick, I didn't feel the urgent need to learn the art of making a pasty from her...it was just something I wanted to do "sometime." Once she got sick, she no longer had the energy to spend a couple hours in the kitchen, putting dinner together. Even on her good days, she tired easily and was much more comfortable sitting in the sun room chatting than working in the kitchen.

As Mom got sick, I did spend more time talking to her...about how it felt when I was first born...being a new mother. I asked her to share more memories from her childhood...her teenage years and her college years...and stories about when she and Dad first met. When I got pregnant with Henry, and she started getting sicker, I remember finally feeling that feeling of urgency...wanting to know all I could about Mom before I could no longer simply ask her.

It's thanks to Mom, and to Brady, that we didn't take time with Henry for granted. I certainly didn't do this because I feared his life would be cut so short. I simply did it because I knew how precious time is. Even if Henry hadn't gotten sick and passed away, he still wouldn't be the tiny baby he was when he was born, or the infant just learning to eat solid foods. Now he would be a young toddler, crawling and walking, and getting into all kinds of things. So I cherished each moment because I knew that those moments would be gone all too soon.

It's why now, I try not to take time with Tim for granted. I don't expect that he's going anywhere anytime soon, but we will never have this day, this moment, again. I don't make enough time for our family even now. It's something I have tried to improve, but an area where I know I can still make more time. However, I do still try to enjoy the moments we DO have together, even if they aren't frequent enough. Time is one of those things we can't make more of...we can't add hours to the day. It's something we'll never have enough of, no matter how hard we try. All we can do, then, is appreciate the time we do have, and make the most of each moment.