As the start of school gets closer, I've been struggling a bit. Not with getting myself or my library ready, or the short number of days of freedom left. Rather I've been struggling as I see moms (and dads) lamenting about their babies starting kindergarten. In fact, I was getting a bit angry. How dare these parents be sad that their child is growing up and moving through life? How dare these parents want time to slow down, for their babies to stay babies?
As I stewed, though, I came to a realization, or several. First, if I were the one sending my baby to kindergarten, I'm sure I would have mixed emotions, and may shed some tears. Even in Henry's short life I remember regularly wishing time would slow down. Second, mixed emotions are the reality for these parents, and that's okay. Just like my reality is missing my boys, and that's okay. Just because I wish for someone else's reality doesn't make them wrong in living it. (If that makes any sense...) My own reality may even be something someone else wishes for...a happy marriage or an enjoyable career.
One thing (of many) that I've learned over the past several years is that I cannot base my happiness on someone else's reality. If I do that, I'll never truly be happy. So to those mamas and daddies sending babies off to school (whether that's kindergarten, high school, or even college), feel away! To those mamas and daddies wishing they had babies to send off to school, feel away! Whatever your reality is, live it and feel it fully. But also try to find the good...to enjoy the life you have, even if you do so while wishing and hoping for a different future.
(Here is a picture from my "reality" last year...my first day back to work last August!)
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