Another of Henry's Lessons

This isn't one of my original top ten lessons Henry taught me, but it's one that struck me today.  As I was (what else) perusing Facebook, a cancer mom on my friends list commented that her Facebook seemed full of people complaining...not getting to sleep in, having to go to work, it's raining...those kinds of things.  As I read this, and responded, I realized that this was another one of Henry's lessons...seeing the positive.

I used to be a self-proclaimed (and known by my friends) "Negative Nellie."  I always tended to see the bad in a situation, and I tended to dwell on this.  At work I would get frustrated when people didn't see my point of view, or do things the way I thought they should be done, and that consumed me.  I didn't see the positive things the kids were doing, or what I was learning from others.  I would get frustrated when I couldn't sleep in, or when the weather didn't cooperate with my plans.  I would get especially frustrated when work or studying got in the way of having fun.

Now, at a time in my life when I really could focus on the negatives, I find myself seeing more positive.  I see the flowers that are brighter because of the rain.  I may not get to sleep in, but I get to wake up.  Work may drive me crazy, but it gives me something to do, and gives me a purpose at a time when I feel lost.  And it gives me a paycheck so that I am able to live in a house I love, eat without worrying about where the next meal is coming from, and feed my three crazy dogs.  Although I could sink into despair (and I certainly do at times), I know from recent experience that it could always be worse.  I could be sitting in a hospital watching my baby struggle for every breath...see him hooked up to so many machines it's hard to even see his beautiful face.  Do I wish Henry were still here fighting?  Selfishly, of course I do.  But then I imagine him running free and happy all around the heavens with Brady and all of his other baby angel friends, and I know that he's well and happy.  I could be struggling and alone, but instead I have an army of supporters, and my family and friends to pick me up when I fall.

So, yes, I have been dealt a bit of a rough hand (to put it mildly) over the last few years.  But I have had some amazing joys as well.  I know that I will have tough days, and I will have better days, and some day it will all make sense (even if that day doesn't come until the day I die.)  And I have Brady and Henry to thank for my renewed attitude on life...for being so little they sure did have a lot of wisdom to share!